Let me save you 7-10 bucks and just tell you this movie is an awful steaming turd and a waste of your money.


True, I haven’t seen it, BUT since Miss Cleo has gone into a pronounced hiding, I have been given her powers for safe keeping. I projected into the future months ago when I saw the first add for this and foresaw it sucked a large one.

First off, I love Burt Reynolds and his 'stach, but he is not Boss Hog. Boss Hog was fat and sweaty. The least he could do is put on some weight for the part. Same goes for Willie Nelson. He could have used the munchies to fuel an eating spree and bulk up, because Uncle Jessie is not a toothpick.

Jessica Simpson might be the one shinning star because she is smart enough to know people love dumb blonds and she plays the part well. I can just see the look on her husband’s face when I watch their reality show. He is just begging Jessica to break out her well worn Sartre volumes and stop acting like she is confused about the difference between tuna and chicken.

Now granted, Stiffler and El jackass Extraordinaire might spend their hour and half of screen time stapling stuff to their respective testicles, but I highly doubt it. Truth be told, that would redeem this steaming pile. The old show was just good clean fun. As a shorty coming up, it was the one thing “Southern” that didn’t embarrass the crap out of me.

Luckily the “Wonder Woman” franchise remains untapped. Let me hang on to my first memories of Linda Carter and female empowerment. I was too young to realize she was dressed like a hooker, but heck, it was the 70s.

If your money is really burning a hole in your pocket, then buy me a ticket to see the sequel to “Douche Bigalow”